The Death of a Family

Sixteen years ago today after taking care of my Mother - In - Law around the clock for a week, she left this life to enter into Heaven's gates.  It was a labor of love because she and I had a relationship that had grown into one of love and admiration over the years.  I did not realize at the time but her death was the beginning of the end of the family I knew and loved.

D loved his mother with great dedication, joy and tremendous pain.  Her failing health for the five years prior to her death made his connection to her all the more important.  We would praise GOD for the good times and cry in the difficult.

When D's Dad was in the hospital, I was the one who took time off work to take care of his Mom. For years after her death I took care of D's Dad during and after surgeries, illnesses and hospitalizations.  I did these because I believed we were family and for no other reason.

After D's death, I became another tragedy of his death.  The family I once belonged to closed ranks around each other and I became separated from that family.  A family that I had been a part of for over 25 years.

Birthday's and holidays come and go.  I am no longer the hostess of such events, nor am I
invited to any of these events.  Am I bitter.....at times, but I realize now that I was always just an outsider accepted only for the duration of my sweet D's life.

Was it their grief at the death of D that made it easier to shut me out or was it my own grief that prevented me from continuing to put myself in their lives?

So today I will remember my sweet times with D's Mom, D and his Dad.  Thankful for the blessings, the love, the fun and the sadness of it all.

Today I am stronger, more determined and more at peace with the death of the family that once was. Today I realize that I as long as I am a child of HIS family I have no need for anything else.